Friday, October 8, 2010

Make it, don't fake it!

So.... What's your attitude like? How do you respond when life just seems to keep piling it on? Do you whine, complain and tell any who will listen how unfair life is?
Henry Ford is quoted as saying" If you think you can, or you can't; you're right." It can also be said that "What you think, is what you become"
Do you really want to be the person that people see coming and they say, "Lord, here comes so and so, she is so negative!" People like to hang around with people who fill their bucket. People who make them feel good about themselves. Negative people just seem to make the burdens of life harder to bare.
Life is hard and can be "unfair" So what? Get over it!
Getting over it is harder to do than say, but there are ways to do it. You can do it! You owe it to yourself and your loved ones to be a more positive person.

I highly recommend the "fake it, till you make it" way.
Thought patterns that you have nurtured for all your life don't magically go away because you want them too. It takes time and work. Sometimes though you really need to change your attitude and behavior before you manage to change your mind and heart. That is were "fake it, till you make it comes in."

Imagine that your husband has been a real jerk and now he is making an honest attempt to redeem himself. You would like to be forgiving but your hearts not there. Acting kind and thoughtful even when you don't feel like it, will change your heart. Attempt one act of kindness towards your spouse without any expectation for pro quo once a day. You will be amazed that your heart will soon follow.

These ideas aren't new. In a book called "Getting the Love you Want: A guide for couples" There are wonderful suggestions for creating a marriage that is fulfilling for both of you. Of course,
just look in the bible and you see the example of Christ. The bible is an excellent source of information on how to live a happy and fulfilled life!
For teachers who work with very difficult students "fake it, till you make it" works as well, Imagine that there is a child who makes you completely insane! This child is worse than fingernails on a chalkboard...the sound of this child's voice makes you want to wrap you hands around their neck...... (We've all been there.)
You know that you can't respond in a negative way but it's so hard!
So you smile, trying to make it not look like you are grimacing. You are unsuccessful and the child can sense you don't like them and this makes them insecure and creates even more of a problem.

A remedy? Smile as you silently pray for patience. Focus on the child's face right between the eyes, nod you head a few times when they are going on about something you could care less about and continue to pray for love and compassion for them. Ask God and he will change your heart. God has given us his word on that. We can rely on his promises.
Soon you will find that you are listening, that you genuinely care and the child will know it too.
Guard your mind against negative thoughts, guard your tongue from negative speech. Focus on what is positive in your life. Write it down if you need to in a journal, that you can look back at when times are rough. God made us in his image and wants a relationship with you. Put those at the top of your list!

1 comment:

  1. I know that this method works! My neighbor could not stand her son-in-law, when her daughter got married. She began to pray every day for him to become a Christian, and for God to fill her heart with love for him. It took a little while for her to begin to appreciate him for the man that he is, but for over 30 years, she has not had one negative thing to say about the man.

    Your post reminds me of the old saying, "It's not so much that prayer changes things, as that prayer changes you." (Feel free to correct my grammar and punctuation...you know the "teacher" in you wants to!) -jo

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